Monday, April 16, 2007

My first trip to the emergency room

As I mentioned earlier, I've been digitizing some old videotapes, and this weekend I got to one that I'd been wanting to share for the past eight or nine years.

Back in 1998, during the boom times of the WWF, I spotted posters for a new wrestling show called Ring 'n' Ears. I noticed that one of my old wrestling classmates, Bill Skullion, was on the show. I hadn't been in the ring in more than five years, but I wanted to see if I could get on the show. The promoters were game, and gave me a spot as the manager for "Sexy Baby" Jamie Jackson of the Hollywood Hunks, in a four-way match against Bloody Bill and two other guys. Awesome.

The finish involved the two other guys being eliminated somehow, and my guy being tied up in the ropes by Bill. Bill would pull out a cup full of sharp and shiny thumbtacks and pour them out in the center of the ring in preparation for destroying my guy. But my guy had backup! The Hollywood Hunks would hit the ring and make the save, triple-teaming Bill. I'd get so excited, I'd hop up in the ring, grab the microphone, and "ha-ha-ha!" boast about how my Hollywood Hunks had kicked Bill's ass and left him bloody. But my back would be turned, and I wouldn't notice that Bill had made a comeback and cleaned house, kicking my guys out of the ring. He'd tap me on the shoulder to interrupt me, but I'd think it was my guy Sexy Baby, and didn't want to be distracted. Bill would blow his nose on me, I'd turn around, and he'd powerbomb me onto the pile of thumbtacks.

So, here's how it ended up happening:




I wasn't hurt badly, but I ended up with tap-dance shoes -- some of the tacks stuck in my Doc Martens. I also ruined a good pair of jeans from Bill's bloody forehead leaving a crimson smear on the ass of my denim.

Later in the night, everyone on the card was involved in an over-the-top-rope battle royal. The ring announcer (drunk) forgot to introduce me, so I had to scoot in just after the bell rang. I wandered around the ring a while before Jamie held some dude for me to hit. I got smacked and headbutted by "Total" Lee Awesome, who's now a big star known as Bobby Roode -- he was in the main event last time I went to a wrestling show at the Halifax Forum. Over to the other corner, where I started throwing elbow shots at a tall guy called Major Punshiment. His head flew forward as I lunged in, and his forehead smacked me right in the mouth. Ouch. I staggered a few feet over and met up with Dangerboy Derek Wylde, who was assigned to eliminate me from the match. He did his best to put me over the top rope, but I ended up clumsily going out to the floor between the ropes. Thankfully Richard Bloom was on hand to capture it on film, as the video isn't super-sharp. Good luck following me as I make my way from the bottom of the screen, to the upper left, upper right, then out on the right-hand side.





After the show, I went to the Emergency Room at St. Michael's Hospital. I was a little worried that my split lip might need stitches. They said I didn't, and were actually more concerned that I'd hit my head during the powerbomb. I never lost consciousness, so they were only mildly concerned.

That wasn't the last time I was in the ring. I worked a few more times with the Renegade Wrestling Alliance in an interview/personality capacity. But it was certainly the most exciting and eventful time I had in wrestling. Or at least the best story.

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